Ego and Faith inside Relationship

Before I decided to stayed strong on the statement of :

“ I will never have a different religion marriage, no matter the circumstances “,

To be honest I still have a little self doubt and lack of understanding. I still get confused of how God ask us to find a partner that has the same level, condition, stages, or in Indonesia, “setara”, and etc, while at the same time He also want us to implicate that the biggest rule of all is “LOVE”. One perspective say that even if you are different, as long as you both has LOVE, and able to maintain your LOVE to your God (or maybe the opponent’s love to their own God even though I want to believe that all religion refers to one and only God), you can run a marriage. Or even if you both are different, you can balance each other by covering each other imperfection and be a whole pair of completed puzzle. There are much more perspective to make an agreement toward different religion marriage.

On the other side, there are a lot of ignorance and reasons to disagree, which is kinda make sense too. In the beginning God has made woman “the same” as what Adam requires someone who is the same. He needs someone who can understand all of His flaws and having two different religion marriage forced you to understand each other believes. While some particular religion implies that understanding means that they are automatically believes and hold on into that. For example, the man believes in aliens even if it doesn’t make sense and weird, but since the woman is his wife she is obliged to make that happen by buying alien telephone even if she used to believe in monsters, not alien. What if monsters and aliens are hostiles?

2 Corintians 6 : 14-15

Warning Against Idolatry

14 Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? 15 What harmony is there between Christ and Belial[b]? Or what does a believer have in common with an unbeliever?

The bible clearly implies that the human engagement requires both people to believe. How can the man and woman keep believing in aliens and monsters at the same time? *this is just an example

Meanwhile, there is still no obvious answer that: “there is no contradict believes, understanding, concept, or rules between all of religion that exist in this world currently”

If there isn’t then why on one side allows you to do A but the other is not?

You know the most hurtful fact for me that so many years people doubt about is a belief that there is only one religion which is the truest of all and to enter God’s kingdom, you have to have that religion. It is so judgementall and selfish way of thinking honestly. Of course they want people to follow the right path and save ‘em, but I think it is like disrespecting other people believe, which is more than something they have in mind but something that helps them together and able to survive from daily life.

1. Testify

Basic rules for people to have belief, they have to have experience to be able to testify. I have my own. *Once my religion teacher said*

God reach His people in very various, different, unexpected ways, that can not be understand easily by other people. He saved me from my most critical moments in my life. The familiar one, my toxic relationship. At some moments my feelings and brain was still strongly suggest that I can still go through hard times like that, no matter how hurted or tired I am. Mentally or physically. It was all on a very normal time, we were not mad at each other that time and was truly fine and nothing happened because we were also in different cities, very far far away. Suddenly, He reached me out and opened me some vision of relief and happiness, but it does not require me to make a decision right away. He gave me choices. Then after a long process of thinking and praying of course, I finally have the courage to end that.

Same thing also when I was struggling with my family. The problem is still there. When it was fired up there was nothing happened. But when the situation started to get stabilized, He reached me again. He make me do so many things I never thought I could and grant me wishes I never thought I needed. So many of them. I also believe that when I really wanted a cat as my company, a long time later when I no longer think about that, I met Billy on the church and he came to me easily without I forced him to come. I still love him till now and grateful that I have his company. *billy is my cat

Many more, little things I believe happened not because of the universe, but what God wants to.

I can’t imagine how broken I am if I still on that relationship, I could’ve been a drug addict or home runners from my family.

By all that, I should never betrayed Him by giving up into other belief. Being with someone who doesn’t trust Him is also a betrayal ( 2 Corinthians 6:17), much worse it is a sin ( Malachi 2:10 )

2. Bond symbol

According to my religion, in order to get married me and my future husband (consider as the man), we have to follow catholic wedding sacrament as asking God approval and also to unite 2 people as 1. Wedding is very sacred, eternal, carried to death.

Genesis 2:24

24 That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.

As Adam and Eve are made from the same body, a marriage supposed to bond two person together. Which means so much deep than I thought. They must share every single thing in their life. farts, toothbrush, space, time money, energy, so many things. And to combine the two of em, God created Sex. Sex is supposed to be a holy tradition to make 2 individual into 1. “as one flesh”. Flesh as we know, is correlated and symbolized as lust and basic human need. Since they become 1, there is nothing people can do to separate that has already became 1 flesh.

Mark 10:9

9 Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”

On the other hand, there are certain religion that approves divorce.

Mark 10:11

11 He answered, “Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her. 12 And if she divorces her husband and marries another man, she commits adultery.”

Lets say sex A can’t have divorce, but sex B have the right to divorce. If they ended up together, will they eventually still have that choice to separate? Of course sex B can use the right, no matter how faithful they promised in the beginning.

3. Basic human support

Partners should help each other to maintain good relationship closer to God, which I don’t have from my toxic one. I often found myself alone at church, mostly felt sad and desperate about it. Why do I have to try so hard so many times just to get accompany at church? What if I have a relationship with someone who can’t accompany me because he doesn’t want to, but he really can’t? I can’t imagine how much desperate compared to the toxic one. Might’ve been worse.

Let’s say I’m married with the man with different religion, if I want to consult about my religious life, can he suggest or refers or saying things based on my belief? I mean, to help me out he should’ve understand my base of my belief which is Jesus Christ

Not everyone has the capabilities to really trust and believes that Jesus did exist in this world for particular reason and to do some actions. First, He came and raised by VIRGIN Mary, which is already an unbelievable thing to understand with normal human way of thinking. Second, He straighten up and cleared things up that was already written in the bible (kitab taurat) to eliminate any misunderstanding. “I mean, why did He made that in the first if it was a mistake all along?”, they said. Third, he sacrifice his own body, blood, tears, energy, extraordinary pain, and most of all, loss of pride to be crucified and humiliated as Son of God who can only just ask Him to save but He didn’t.

4. My Mom

I'm not lying, she is the person who has more control in my life rather than my father. She's been there for me most of the time. She made me listen to her crappy story of how all her cousins married were ruined because of this issue *i'm sorry, but it is true*. None of her saying is bullsh*t. Even she finally revealed her old crush did came to her in the middle of her marriage *i'm not telling you this much further*.

I betrayed and lie to her once. And it has made me so deeply regret and she was never been that mad and hurt so much. That is one biggest mistake in my life i wish i never did.

She already felt enough pain in her life, since her childhood, and her own family. I also see how Jesus is the one who saved her from frustration, cuz other person who experienced the same could've been anything but a mess. I also do want to break this "family curse" that ruined so many marriages. She is the only one who managed to break the spell, to keep my family whole.

That is why i trust her, and do exactly what she told me not to do. Although i still struggled to do some of it but i will never give up to hold on strongly to her words. And so i often consult to her, even about my dating life. She knows who has ever dated or even friends with me even if she often forgot some of 'em.

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He has already given me love from a long time ago and yet hasn’t leave me yet until now, until I experienced His presence in my life and did saved me from the tragedies I told you about before.

Therefore, if you read this entirely, I really appreciate what you did because no one has ever heard this story before yet no one hasn’t “Listen” to me. I never meant for anyone to change their perspective, I just want to share how I should be grateful of who is God to me and how you should too, even to your own.

Moreover, here is my statement now and i shall not deny that :

“ I will never have a different religion marriage, no matter the circumstances and I will never betray and leave Jesus as my savior, from what He have been done to me“,